Since the beginning of January, my life seems to have had its fair share of ups and downs. You either know about them, or you don’t and I’m not going to burden anybody with them now but they have certainly shaped who I am, sat here writing this today.
I’ve always been a fairly grounded person, but to be honest with you, the only reason that I’ve stayed sane and kept my cool is not only because of the ‘clichéd’ help from friends and family, but because of the fact that deep down in the depths of my mind I know that there is, assuredly and sadly, always somebody more worse off than me.
Thursday 18th August is make or break day for me. It’s a-Level results day and up and down the country there will be thousands of students nervously tearing open their little brown envelope to either life of student debt and a degree that holds little prospects or a life destined to wallow either in self pity or the constant and devilish feeling of ‘WHAT IF?!’.
I hope that I will be neither of the two. I am built with sterner stuff (big headed maybe, but self assessment is the first step to realising my good points and the bad) than weeping on the shoulder of the teacher that hated me, still hates me and will always hate me and I would never hope for anyone to see the sudden flicker of realisation that my world and my life won’t fall into the trap that is stereotype and what I like to call the ‘comfort bubble’ that so many people seem to get caught up in.
Like so many others, I could wallow in my own self pity and lay in bed at night thinking ‘what if?’ but I beg the question; Why should I? For two reasons I won’t let this happen; work has been bred into me. From as soon as I could work, I’ve been told, and willingly gone, to get myself a job. That I did. I hated it, so I moved on. Found something better, with better money, better atmosphere and now I find myself holding down three jobs, willing the time to come when I can retire; but I have a million and one goals and objectives that I want to achieve and reach. Opportunities come and go but isn’t it up to us to take them when they come? I’m excited for University, yet I’m also excited to being a real adult and being in the position where I am finally in charge of my own destiny, decisions and finances.
Many have you will have read this thinking “why did he post this?!” Well, I posted it because I wanted to post it and also, to get a few thoughts out of my mind. Sometimes, I feel like my head is so full of thoughts, it could explode…but that’s what an over active imagination does to you. Secondly, I posted this to prove to whoever is reading this and may be in the same position, or about to face these issues, that its not the end of the world and although its hard work, there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. It’ll all be worth it, if you’re worth the wait.
